Blind Fondness

Your Story My Pen

A story of @mr.choudhuryy

Penned by me @waniyasays

“Do you still love me?”

“Let us talk about something else” she said. Every time I try to pull back the feel of love, she shoves the moment and bends the discussion to something very irrelevant and I keep answering to what I listen. I want this to be more firm again and not limited to just being friends. This cannot be just another social media love story ending with being strangers. How can I be a best friend to her with countless memories?

From last two months we are not in touch. We faced each other after six months of relationship. Those six months of love and fondness possess next level of emotions without any physical expression. I still adore 2015 the way our relationship started. And I remember it was 17th of May a sudden plan, I was returning from my school St. Xavier’s it was alumni celebration that day, she asked me to wait nearby her home. Running out of ideas what is going to happen next I agreed, short time and I was easily frightened and contented; the moment I saw her, my heart got totally hacked she was as pretty as a picture. I adored her look and we were grinning uncannily at each other. That blue suit was perfectly going with the vibes of love, making her look astonishing. My glance noticed falling sun on her black hair making them look pretty brownish.

One after another meetings flowed in story. We used to walk on those never ending road’s together; Nine-ten kilometers seem simple with no fret but togetherness. Holding hands and never letting go with the everlasting promise to stay. Traveling to unknown places carrying our love turned usual. No one can ever think but we did train journeys just for togetherness. We use to travel new places and she loved being with me. Once she was sitting right in front of me on window seat and I was goggling at her, she noticed my gaze; the way her grace transformed in her radiant blush made her look even more beautiful. Our love seemed eternal. Spending life with her was so easy.

I wish those roads would have never end, I wish we would not have returned from those bike rides. We adored the beauty of streets like the only lovers in the world, road surrounded by trees; a canal passing by, felt those breezes jointly, and actually living in satisfaction of being loved back with the same intensity. You can easily imagine loving souls on bike rides, love in the air and the missing background music we use to enjoy it by playing tracks on phones and singing along with it. Picture perfect rides and our love was growing with her ideas of surprises every month; handmade cards filled with affection and never ending possessive concern.

Goosebumps! When I think she used to cook for me like the way my mother does for family. Moments worth living for love; lunch box filled with love and we are off to tourist spots Rondhia Dam, Bholpur- Shantiniketan. It was about 7:00 PM that day we were together holding hands twenty-five kilometers away on newly discovered station, place wasn’t crowded. Perturbed to find a way out how to get back, ‘what happened?’ she asked ‘nothing’ I replied. What made her do that but it was unreal act of her from my point of imagination; gesture of sudden kiss astounds me for good ten seconds, on that over bridge I got trembled.

Love is easy when new; you understand and sacrifice for each other. Fighting efforts never dulls your fire. We were suitably equal to marry, we thought. Childish and adorable the way she used to handle my vexation with love, her nonplused apologies tug me more in love, at my place just for ‘a sorry’ and her inspiring affection with haldiram bhujiyas and coke was enough of stupidity I signed but find it cute though.

It was all going great but every love story has some memorable scratches!

One fine day I was going through my facebook news feed, scrolling; I stopped at a post of my acquaintance ‘a girl’. We use to talk occasionally, finding picture beautiful and worth appreciating I pinged her trifling “your lips are irresistible” and her reply was accustomed with a “Thank you!” and then my scroll went with the flow.

(My next meeting) After a long, finally I was happy for the reason that I am going to meet my girlfriend. I complimented unconscious regarding the upcoming cataclysm “the best of you is what I see when I see” my compliment didn’t sounded as an appreciation to her. Suddenly she surprised me her words “how could you do this to me after so much of love and respect we contributed”. I went white with no real idea behind her concerns “tell me what happened”?

Screenshots in my hand misinterpreting the whole scenario (the scene of the day when I complimented that girl replayed in my head again) and I understood what’s the matter is and  claimed my innocence regarding those texts “I have done nothing that was just trifling” my appeals weren’t heard and no apologies worked. “You cheated on me there must be something else you people are planning to go for”, I was all white with no explanation and full of apologies trying to make her believe the actual scene but nothing made any sense to her because she was hurt.

  • Unaware of that girl’s feelings I used to talk and ping her that day with trifling. Never knew she was the stalker and knows about my relationship. Screenshots of what was usual made it look deceived to my precious, made her believe the counterfeit. I never imagined she could ever do such measures that will let my gem at risk.

Days passed by and life was not the same as it was, the love and peace went away with her. I remember her words after my apologies “If you want me in your life we can still be ‘just friends’.” and I agreed, because it was the only way I could manage to be with her, with a thought that I will drag back and fix what is broken, my love will convince her to believe what is actual.

One day I convened my broken pieces while we were chatting and took a hang of seconds without replying to her normal text and asked:

“Do you still love me?”

“Let us talk about something else” she said. Every time I try to pull back the feel of love, she shoves the moment and bends the discussion to something very irrelevant and I keep answering to what I listen. I want this to be more firm again and not limited to just being friends. This cannot be just another social media love story ending with being strangers. How can I be a best friend to her with countless memories?

It hurts when people lose real sense of you and accept what is counterfeit.

I respect the decisions but I miss the bonds and I want myself to grow from this to a better side, past is what I adore and not regret. I never stopped loving but I don’t want to waste this life grieving. My emotional attachment was firm but I’m supposed to live for myself after all the efforts I did. I never wasted my time neither she did.

Yes! Strange it is that after all love and friendship bonds we are strangers again.

But life is all about facing new chapters and choosing whether to learn and pass or regret and fail. 

  • Silence your mind because your soul knows how to heal itself!

 

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